Texts from Dog

Author: October Jones
Publisher: HMH
ISBN: 0544080068
Format: PDF, Kindle
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He’s a dog with a phone . . . My dog sends me texts. Yeah. It’s weird. When October Jones figured out he could send text messages to himself on his mobile phone, he naturally decided that the best use of this discovery was to send passive-aggressive messages to himself under the guise of his bulldog. And so the exasperating, slightly delusional, and utterly endearing Dog and his alter-ego, BatDog, were born. Texts from Dog features Dog’s attempts to keep the neighborhood safe from the likes of Mr. Postman and his arch-nemesis Cat-Cat—he has managed to only smash three TVs and a patio door in the process. And in between crime fighting sprees and run-ins with the squirrel mafia, there are romantic interludes with pillows, fetch sessions gone terribly awry, and the abusive banter only a bromance between man and his text-savvy dog can spawn. For those of us who have ever had a conversation with a pet in our heads, Texts from Dog will make you laugh out loud and perhaps even make you think twice about leaving your pet home alone for the day.

Crusoe the Celebrity Dachshund

Author: Ryan Beauchesne
Publisher: St. Martin's Griffin
ISBN: 1466886021
Format: PDF, Docs
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What?! You've never heard of Crusoe the celebrity dachshund?! You must be living under a rock! ... Or at least that's what Crusoe thinks. He's the self-proclaimed "wiener dog who thinks he's more of a celebrity than he really is" (until now!). Crusoe is the star of his wildly popular blog of the same name, winner of the 2013 AND 2014 Best Pet Blog Award. That's right... two years in a row! Because Crusoe is a talented and ridiculously photogenic miniature dachshund with a big personality, stunning fashion sense, and an insatiable penchant for whimsy. Perhaps you know him better by his infamous alter ego, BATDOG? We thought so. This is Crusoe's New York Times bestselling book debut and he's so excited to share it with all of his adoring fans. Now everyone can stare lovingly into his big brown eyes and admire his wit and many costumes any time they choose. Crusoe is certain that his book will make the perfect gift for dog-lovers of all ages. He wants to be accessible to his fans so you can really get to know the mutt behind the mask, the pooch behind that signature sexy pout; the pup with a heart of gold. Can't miss Crusoe Features in the Book: The adventures of BATDOG and Robin Cooking with Crusoe Dr. Crusoe, the Dentist, and Malpractice International travels with the worldliest of adventure dogs Partners in crime with Crusoe and twin brother Oakley

You Had One Job

Author: Beverly L. Jenkins
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 1449480691
Format: PDF, Docs
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If someone hangs a stop sign upside down or paints crooked lines on a highway, count on someone else to snap a photo and post it online. You Had One Job! is a collection of hilarious pictures features job-related disasters and general ineptitudes. All of these new, never-before-seen images will be accompanied by witty captions.

Zelda Wisdom

Author: Carol Gardner
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 9780740718977
Format: PDF, Kindle
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Zelda, a seven-year-old bulldog, is the most unlikely of supermodels, who happens to star in the Zelda Wisdom greeting card line and other licensed products. This kit includes a 32-page booklet from her book, Zelda Wisdom, and a canine cut-out that stands up and can be dressed in three ravishing cling-made outfits. The combination is a howl!

Yoga Dogs

Author: Dan Borris
Publisher: ABRAMS
ISBN: 1613120931
Format: PDF, ePub, Docs
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Learn how to sit, stay, and roll over with this fully illustrated, “delightful” guide to yoga starring man’s best friend (Shutterbug magazine). Inspired by a friend’s mastiff who would imitate his master’s morning yoga routine, photographer Dan Borris created Yoga Dogs, a full-color collection of forty-five different dogs and puppies doing human yoga poses. Don’t worry: No animals were harmed during the making of these images; their extreme flexibility is the result of clever digital trickery. The curious, humorous, and distinctly original pictures are paired with useful information about the poses, as well as some funny canine meditations. “A fresh and highly entertaining visual treat,” Yoga Dogs is perfect for any yogi of the two or four-legged variety (Shutterbug magazine).

The Best of the Rejection Collection

Author: Matthew Diffee
Publisher: Workman Publishing
ISBN: 0761168664
Format: PDF, Kindle
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It’s the best of the worst: 293 of the funniest cartoons rejected by The New Yorker but luckily for us, now in paperback and available to enjoy. The Rejection Collection brings together some of The New Yorker’s brightest talents—Roz Chast, Gahan Wilson, Sam Gross, Jack Zeigler, David Sipress, and more—and reveals their other side. Their dark side. Their juvenile side. Their sick side. Their naughty side. Their outrageous side. And what a treat. Ventriloquist dummy cartoons. Operating room cartoons. Bring your daughter to work day cartoons (the stripper, the prison guard on death row). Lots of couples in bed, quite a few coffins, wise-cracking animals—an obsessive’s plumbing of the weird, the scary, the off-the-wall, and done so without restraint. Every week The New Yorker receives 500 cartoon submissions, and rejects a great majority—mostly, of course, for not being funny enough. There’s no question why these were rejected, and it’s not for lack of laughs. One can almost hear Eustace Tilley sniffing, We are not amused.

Texts from Mittens

Author: Angie Bailey
Publisher: Harlequin
ISBN: 1460380800
Format: PDF, Mobi
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Texts from Mittens is a series of text message conversations between a snappy, self-absorbed housecat named Mittens and his long-suffering human, a single woman who works away from home during the day. Mittens relentlessly hassles his human all day long, while only taking breaks to watch Judge Judy, hang with his best friend Stumpy, complain about the antics of Drunk Patty the neighbor, ask Grandma for money to buy useless items from QVC, and harass the "filthy beast" dog, Phil. Angie Bailey is an award-winning writer and blogger, humorist, and professional member of the Cat Writers' Association. Her primary blog, Catladyland, has won many awards, and her humor writing is featured nearly daily on Catster.com, one of the most popular cat sites on the Web. She loves to photograph her cats in silly poses and sleeps with one eye open. And yes, she has three cats. "Each installment of Texts From Mittens is like a little gift to brighten your day!" —Kate Benjamin, Hauspanther founder and co-author of Catification with Jackson Galaxy "Texts From Mittens makes me wish my cat had thumbs! This is a hilarious book; Angie Bailey has done it again!" —Jeremy Greenberg, Author of Sorry I Barfed on Your Bed "We all knew that cats were hilarious, but Ms. Bailey's sardonic cat quips really take their mannerisms, attitude and occasional apathy to another level." —Susan Michals, Curator of Cat Art Show Los Angeles Come home! There's an emergency! What?? Are you OK? My dish is half empty! I'll be home soon. You wish starvation upon me! Stop being dramatic. Am weeak. Caan hasrdly tyyppe. Are you going to wear those black pants on your bed? Yes. I have a date. They're comfortable. Mittens, get off my pants! FYI: Poly-blend makes your butt look big

DROPKICKromance

Author: Cyrus Parker
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 1449495001
Format: PDF, Kindle
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The first half of DROPKICKromance focuses on a toxic, long-distance relationship the author was involved in for several years, while the second half focuses on his current relationship with poet Amanda Lovelace, who penned a beautiful foreword for the book. Ultimately, the collection tells about a profound journey of healing.

Dog Shaming

Author: Pascale Lemire
Publisher: Three Rivers Press (CA)
ISBN: 0385349343
Format: PDF
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Based on the web phenomenon Dogshaming and containing photos that are all-new and exclusive to the book, this hilarious album showcases adorable snapshots of shamed pups confessing their biggest - and grossest - sins.

Odd Dog Out

Author: Rob Biddulph
Publisher: HarperCollins UK
ISBN: 000759416X
Format: PDF, Docs
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It’s a dog’s life in the big city... Come join one busy dog on her journey to find her place in the world, in this third sublimely illustrated book from the bestselling, award-winning Rob Biddulph.